Plenty of people will try to teach you how to create a good business card. Catchy, well-designed, well-balanced and unforgettable.
Apart from the plain design (OK by that time), here the best possible business card. You will never forget about this guy.

Unfortunately, we will not know who W.W.Green is.
The exact text:
USED CARS – LAND – WHISKEY – MANURE – NAILS | |
FLY SWATTERS – RACING FORMS – BONGOS | |
ENTERPRISES, Un-Ltd. | |
W. W. GREEN, President | |
Wars Fought | Stud Service |
Revolutions Started | Tigers Tamed |
Assassinations Plotted | Bars Emptied |
Governments Run | Computers Verified |
Uprisings Quelled | Orgies Organized |
If this is not enough for you, I also found this deliciously written business card. Steve Martin used to distribute it around to fans and other people.
It says: “This certifies that you have had a personal encounter with me and that you found me warm, polite, intelligent and funny. Signed Steve Martin”.